A blog analyzing Major League Baseball through the lens of Astrology
Welcome to Astrology Baseball, a project where I arrange MLB players into teams based on their astrological signs, and then pit those teams against each other in mock fantasy seasons.
2020 Playoff Bracket
Now that we’ve gone through all the teams in the 2020 Fantasy Astrology Baseball League, in descending order of total fantasy points on the year, let’s imagine what things might have looked like in a hypothetical playoff setting. With the four classical elements forming the four FABL divisions, it makes sense that the playoffs would be a final four-type situation.
2020 Taurus Bulls
We’ve finally reached the tippity bottom of the 2020 Fantasy Astrology Baseball League standings, which this year is occupied by the Taurus Bulls. The Astro Poets book has a quote that is especially relevant to this sign being in this position: “If you are ever feeling sad, like nothing in the world matters, all you need to do to feel better is watch a Taurus speak about their hopes and dreams. Listening to a Taurus’s words reminds us that if we, too, view life as a slow and deliberate process, we can get back on track toward a goal.”
2020 Sagittarius Archers
I keep referring to the Astro Poets, and it’s especially relevant here because one of them (Alex Dimitrov) happens to be born between November 22nd and December 21st. He writes about his native sign: “‘rebellious’ is a word often used to describe Sagittarians. Another is ‘rude.’ They don’t mince words and they’re straight shooters. If you ask them, they’re just ‘being honest’ and ‘telling it like it is.’”
2020 Libra Scales
During the same period of time where Aries was dominating the Fantasy Astrology Baseball League leaderboards in terms of total fantasy points scored, Libra was actually winning the championships. From 2012 thru 2016, the first five years that I ran a season-long simulation of the FABL, the Scales took home the trophy four times.
2020 Aries Rams
Aries are the fire-breathers of the Zodiac. Known for their quick tempers and passionate personalities, Rams live up to their designation as the Cardinal Fire sign. Dorothea Lasky of the Astro Poets (herself an Aries) writes, “Aries do tend to get very angry from time to time (read: every hour, on the hour).”
2020 Capricorn Goats
Reading what Dorothea Lasky of the Astro Poets has to write about Capricorn, you’d think it was the ideal sign for all professional athletes. “A Capricorn will endure, conquer, and overcome any obstacle in their path, and it is the one sign of the zodiac that no one will ever beat… No other sign has the grit to dig into existence the way a Capricorn does.”
2020 Gemini Twins
The sign of Gemini is all about duality. Their “mascot” is the Twins, which would seem to make them analogous to the MLB franchise that plays in Minnesota, if not for the yellow color associated with people born between May 21st and June 20th.
2020 Leo Lions
I was aware of the famous Leo competitive spirit even before reading the work of the Astro Poets. To this, Dimitrov and Laskey add that “Leos are natural leaders. They’re also effective motivators and their power is rooted in magnetism.” Many of the baseball players born between July 23rd and August 22nd have displayed this leadership quality…
2020 Scorpio Scorpions
My foremost experts on Astrology (i.e. the only ones I’ve read in any kind of depth), the Astro Poets, put great emphasis on the sign of Scorpio. “No sign is more tied to the art and science of astrology in our present-day culture than Scorpio.” They claim that this is because “the number-one reason people want to learn about astrology is because they have been in love with a Scorpio.”
2020 Cancer Crabs
All the research I’ve done into the Cancer astrology sign agrees on two things: Cancerians are introverts and they have unresolved mommy issues. As someone whose birthday falls between June 21st and July 23rd myself, I can confirm at least one of those things are true.
2020 Virgo Maidens
In this age of advanced analytics and Sabermetrics, it seems like Virgos would be at a distinct advantage. According to the Astro Poets, Virgos “like systems, logic, and problem-solving,” while conversely “they view feelings as uncontrollable, minefields of desire.” Definitely not the mindset of a veteran scout who uses the “eye test” to evaluate players, and uses concepts like “makeup” instead of looking at statistics.
2020 Aquarius Water Carriers
If you’ve followed my writings on Astrology Baseball, you’ll know that Aquarius hasn’t finished anywhere near the top of the league in overall fantasy points at any point in the last 50 years… until 2020! But it’s true that the small sample size inherent in a 60-game season plays total havoc with fantasy point totals over a full year.
2020 Astrology Baseball Recap
2020 was a season unlike any other in Major League Baseball history. The COVID-19 pandemic reduced what’s usually a six-month marathon that plays host to millions of fans, into a two-month sprint played in empty stadiums. But despite these social distancing measures, we ended up getting a much larger playoff pool than usual, which is a little strange, since you’d think that MLB would have wanted to give more players the opportunity to stay safer at home with their families.